================================================================== TOPFIVE.COM'S LITTLE FIVERS -- MOVIES Slippery when fun. ================================================================== August 27, 2004 NOTE FROM KRISTIAN: Regarding the upcoming presidential election, some people say, "Anybody but Bush." Anybody, huh? The Top 9 Differences Under President Courtney Love 9. "Hell yeah, I inhaled!" 8. New cabinet position: Secretary of Skank 7. Now only on HBO, State of the Union address surpasses Scarface for usage of "the F word". 6. Invitation to sleep in the Lincoln Bedroom includes "fringes". 5. Constant stumbling and falling down makes Gerald Ford look like a ballerina. 4. Decides D.C. blows; our new capital is Amsterdam! 3. Easy, affordable access to prescription drugs not just available to seniors. 2. Good-bye Hail to the Chief, hello I Touch Myself. and the Number 1 Difference Under President Courtney Love... 1. Secret Service less worried about possible psycho in the crowd, more worried about the one they are guarding. [ Copyright 2004 by Chris White ] [ www.topfive.com ] ================================================================== BIG HITS America's Sweetheart by Courtney Love Cruel and Unusual: Bush/Cheney's New World Order ==================================================================
================================================================== Selected from 46 submissions from 14 contributors. Today's Top 5 List authors are: ------------------------------------------------------------------ Brandon Hunt, Braintree, MA -- 1 (4th #1) Jill Gallagher, Seattle, WA -- 2 Danny Gallagher, Henderson, TX -- 3, 5, RU list name Jennifer Ford, Ft. Wayne, IN -- 3 John English, Orem, UT -- 4 Scott Witmer, Hanover, PA -- 6, 7 Scott Bostick, Lake Ridge, VA -- 7 Kim Moser, New York, NY -- 8 Janis Spidle, Kansas City, MO -- 8 Arthur Levesque, Laurel, MD -- 9 Kristian Idol, Burbank, CA -- Editor, Ex-Stripper ------------------------------------------------------------------ Differences Under President Courtney Love RUNNERS UP list -- Full of Holes ------------------------------------------------------------------ Stripper poles on Air Force One, mosh pit in White House basement. (William C. Martell, Studio City, CA) Automatic 5 year sentence for wearing underpants. (William C. Martell, Studio City, CA) After a night of wild partying, randomly declares war on an Arab nation. So, not much difference. (John English, Orem, UT) State of the Union address still just a bunch of incoherent double talk, but at the end she flashes her breasts. (Curtis Stoddard, Milwaukie, OR) (Brandon Hunt, Braintree, MA) Vast restructuring of all Federal law enforcement and security agencies into something way less uptight and prone to the arresting and stuff. (Jennifer Ford, Ft. Wayne, IN) ================================================================== [ Copyright 2004 by Chris White All rights reserved. ] [ Do not forward, publish, broadcast, or use ] [ in any manner without crediting "TopFive.com" ] ==================================================================
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