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                          July 10, 2009                           

                       NOTE FROM KRISTIAN:                        

             Sure, several celebrities passed away in             
              the last two weeks, but what about the              
                 ones pulled back from the edge?                  


            The Top 9 Hollywood Near-Death Experiences            


 9. Paris Hilton: "I was floating above the bed, looking down at
    myself... and I said to myself, 'I'm hot.'"

 8. Steven Spielberg: "I was falling and falling and falling so I
    just yelled 'Cut!'"

 7. Michael Moore: "God looked just like Charlton Heston! And He
    sent me back to open up a gun store."

 6. Denzel Washington: "There was this long tunnel... so I figured
    it was God's way of saying 'Do the remake of Pelham 123.'"

 5. Shirley MacLaine: "And there was Gandhi, and he said, 'Nope,
    that was your last life. Take the hall on your left for a
    trillion years of purgatory.'"

 4. Keanu Reeves: "When I approached Actor's Heaven, my key
    wouldn't open the lock! And I was, like, 'Whoa.'"

 3. Robin Williams: "I was in line about a mile behind my career."

 2. Bela Lugosi: To die, to be really dead... it was glorious!


    and the Number 1 Hollywood Near-Death Experience...


 1. Rodney Dangerfield: "NEAR death? Are you kiddin' me? I've been
    dead for years! I tell ya, no respect..."



              [   Copyright 2009 by Chris White    ]              
              [          www.topfive.com           ]              


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Selected from 23 submissions from 8 contributors.
This week's list authors are:
------------------------------------------------------------------
John English, Orem, UT           -- 1, 5, 6 (On the lot!)
Bruce Alter, Fairfax Station, VA -- 2
Scott Witmer, Hanover, PA        -- 3, 4
Donald Johnson, Cincinnati, OH   -- 7
Judith Cotrill, Bronx, NY        -- 8, 9
Kristian Idol, Burbank, CA       -- Cecil B. DeCeased

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