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                          March 22, 2002

                        NOTE FROM KRISTIAN:

        For the venerable Academy Awards (Sunday! Sunday!),
            the Oscars are chosen by Academy members,
         some of which are said to be well past middle-age.


         The Top 7 Signs the Academy Members Are Too Old 


 9. Refer to Ian McKellan as "that upstart British kid".

 8. Bathrooms in new Kodak Theater have coin-op Depends machines.

 7. Easily impressed with array of choices among "talkies".

 6. They actually care about Liza's wedding to that gay guy.

 5. Remember when Oscar was only this tall.

 4. "Hey you kids, get off my set!"

 3. Modern editing techniques wreak havoc on their pacemakers.

 2. When the Academy Awards first debuted, Oscar had hair.


    and the Number 1 Sign the Academy Members Are Too Old...


 1. J-Lo is what they had for dessert last night and Hip Hop is
    a side effect of replacement surgery.



              [   Copyright 2002 by Chris White   ]
              [          www.topfive.com          ]


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Selected from 21 submissions from 5 contributors.
Today's Top 5 List authors are:
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William C. Martell, Screenwriter -- 1, 6, 8 (8th #1)
Beth Kujawski, Voice Talent      -- 2
Jennifer A. Ford, Web Designer   -- 3, 4, 9
Wade Kwon, Civilian              -- 5, 7
Kristian Idol, Writer/Director   -- Moderator

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[      Copyright 2002 by Chris White   All rights reserved.      ]
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