Ways to Trick Critics Into Giving You a Good Review

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                            May 3, 2002


                 The Top 6 Ways to Trick Critics
                  Into Giving You a Good Review 


 6. Lock them in the theater for 24 hours. Show Freddy Got
    Fingered 10 times, then show your movie.

 5. Pre-preview lap dances.

 4. Lace the popcorn with LSD.

 3. "Best review wins a date with Shannon Elizabeth!"

 2. Subliminal shots of Angelina Jolie from Gia.


             and the Number 1 Way to Trick Critics
                Into Giving You a Good Review...


 1. (Whispered V.O.) We've replaced the crap critics are used to
     seeing with a good film. Let's see if anyone can tell the
     difference...



              [   Copyright 2002 by Chris White   ]
              [          www.topfive.com          ]


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Selected from 14 submissions from 4 contributors.
Today's Top 5 List authors are:
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Beth Kujawski, Voice Talent    -- 1, 5, 6 (Three picture deal)
Kenn McCracken, Comics Editor  -- 2, 3
Wade Kwon, Civilian            -- 4
Kristian Idol, Writer/Director -- Moderator

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[      Copyright 2002 by Chris White   All rights reserved.      ]
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