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             TOPFIVE.COM'S LITTLE FIVERS  --  MOVIES              
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                        November 16, 2007                         

                       NOTE FROM KRISTIAN:                        

             The Writers Guild is striking studios in             
                order to get a better share of DVD                
                   profits and new media sales.                   


             The Top 9 Writers Guild Contract Demands             


 9. Any actor changing the lines gets bitch-slapped after the
    scene is shot.

 8. Kill the guy who writes "In a world..." for trailers.

 7. At least 15% of the movies made each year must feature a lead
    character who is a virile, sexy scriptwriter.

 6. Six figures. Two blondes, two brunettes, two redheads.

 5. More old scripts they can use as new scripts just by changing
    the names.

 4. If an athlete is going to cameo as himself on a sitcom, he
    writes his own jokes instead of butchering mine.

 3. Three cents for every time one of their catchphrases winds up
    on a message board or email signature.

 2. All DVDs must contain a PDF of the original screenplay so the
    viewer can see what could have been.


        and the Number 1 Writers Guild Contract Demand...


 1. Eva Longoria must deliver pizza even when we aren't on the
    picket line.



              [   Copyright 2007 by Chris White   ]               
              [          www.topfive.com          ]               


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Selected from 27 submissions from 9 contributors.
This week's list authors are:
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Curtis Stoddard, Milwaukie, OR      -- 1
John English, Orem, UT              -- 2, 3, 4 (Three pic deal!)
Janis Spidle, Kansas City, MO       -- 5
William C. Martell, Studio City, CA -- 6, 8
Donald Johnson, Cincinatti, OH      -- 7
Judith Cotrill, Bronx, NY           -- 9
Kristian Idol, Burbank, CA          -- Stands with the writers

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                  Writers Guild Contract Demands                  
            RUNNERS UP list  --  Nothing But the Truth            
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More than 4 cents on every $22 DVD you buy... which costs 25 cents
to manufacture and makes $17.26 in profit for the studios.
          (William C. Martell, Studio City, CA)

As far as Internet streaming, downloads, iTunes and podcasting of
something I spent months creating and perfecting, how about a
little more than ZERO cents??
          (Kristian Idol, Burbank, CA)

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